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My wife and I recently had a discussion concerning our alma mater. She had just spoken to one of her mentors, who called our alma mater’s business college “incestuous”. He was referring to the fact that the business college allows you to minor only in a subject in the same college.

I did not realize this because I never explored the option of a minor. I got my degree in marketing as soon as I could and never considered anything else.

For reference, my wife graduated with a sociology degree. Her mentor was ranting that sociology would be a great minor for someone majoring in marketing. He argued that marketing is a discipline of sociology (maybe it should be called “consumer sociology”).

And I agree. There was a time when I considered majoring in sociology. Just before I settled on marketing. The concept of sociology intrigued me — the study of social human behavior. I’ve always found people to be very interesting, and I’ve always been a people watcher. So I thought, what could be better? Then I decided that I had better get a degree that might be more useful.

So that’s how I got into marketing.

Now that I’m out of the classroom and actually do independent reading, I realize that marketing is a very social study. Marketing is the study of people’s purchasing motivations. What do they relate with? What are they willing to spend time and money on?

When people make purchases, they do not always do so for the most logical reasons. They do not always make the most economical decisions. Often they make a decision because it makes them feels good. Does this make sense? No, but guess what — people don’t make sense. That’s what makes them interesting.

So why do I feel that sociology is relevant to marketing? Marketing and sociology are concerned with many of the same things (demographics and Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, for instance). And because people’s purchasing decisions are rarely based on business concepts. If you’re always thinking like a businessman and spouting off jargon, you’re likely not going to hit people where it counts — in their hearts.

In order to do that, you need a better understanding of people. And you don’t get that from marketing alone. A business student should feel free to dabble in sociology or psychology in order to gain a better understanding of who he’s trying to reach.

You hear it over and over again — new marketing is all about connections and interaction. How do you expect to connect and interact with people if you can’t understand them and can’t relate? Stop looking at people as dollar signs. Start seeing them for what they are: very simple, yet very complicated and contradictory beings.

Your bosses are unfair. Your professor didn’t like you from the moment you first sat in his class. The world is against you. You can justify your failures any number of ways you choose, and you can make convincing arguments and maybe convert a few people to your side. But just because you can do it doesn’t mean you should. Why? Because although making excuses may make you feel better about yourself, in the long run it does you no good.

Change your mentality. Take your share of the blame.

Are you having trouble getting your dream job right now? Yeah, so are a lot of other people. And they cite the same reason you do: the economy. I have no doubt that the economy is a significant hinderance, but that kind of thinking benefits no one. The average job seeker is facing great difficulty in finding employment right now. But you’re not average, are you? Of course not! Because the average person is sitting around whining about his bad luck. But not you. No, you’re too busy trying to figure out what you’re doing wrong and making changes.

Or maybe you’re unhappy with the job you do have. You can gripe and complain about why you’re not succeeding, but ask yourself one question: Did you honestly believe that you were a good fit for the position? Or did you know that you weren’t a good fit yet take the job anyway? If the letter is the case, you know you are to blame.

This goes beyond your professional life. Let’s try relationships. So some cute little guy or gal just broke your poor little heart. Yeah, it was really crummy what that person did to you. So that person’s purely to blame and you’re 100% innocent, right? Wrong! So wrong! There’s a really good chance that things happened that would have tipped you off if you weren’t too busy playing a fool in the game of love. What about the way that person acted differently when you were around other people? Or how that person was always pushing away commitment when you knew damn well that it was time to take it to the next level. Or the person was still good friends — maybe too good of friends — with an old significant other. Yeah, you should have seen that coming. Take your part of the blame.

I propose an exercise: The next time you fail, no matter the circumstance, I want you to place the blame on yourself. And no one else, only yourself. I want you to think about what you could have done differently. I think you’ll be surprised by what you discover, and you’ll be a better person for it.

The world can be an ugly place, I get that. So much is unfair in the world and sometimes you feel as if you can never get a break. The world is against you, it’s all one big conspiracy.

But you don’t let that get you down. Because you’re an optimist, and you always remain hopeful. No matter the scenario. Rain or shine, you’re always smiling. Who cares what the numbers look like, you know you’ll come out ahead. As long as you keep smiling.

There’s nothing wrong with being an optimist. In fact, I recommend it. I see no point in being a pessimist. Sitting around complaining and bringing everyone down will get you nowhere. But being too much of an optimist can hold you back as well.

Staying positive can work wonders. Simply having a positive mindset can give you the strength and determination to get through some unfavorable situations. If you can’t find it in yourself to be positive in the face of adversity, surround yourself with positive people. But don’t be a fool. Make sure that you keep your eyes open so that you can read the writing on the wall. Don’t let yourself be blinded by optimism.

Too much of a good thing may be a bad thing.

Optimism overdose can lead to inaction. Don’t get to the point that you sit around and wait for things to happen. Telling yourself that it’ll all work out in the end is fine as long as you’re doing something to make it work out.

Unfortunately, there are times when even action with optimism can’t get you through things. This is when you should be a realist and read the writing on the wall. And if you need help identifying these moments, I recommend this little book…

Quitting isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes optimists can’t recognize that. Let the realist in you tell you when it’s time to call it quits.

I have always prided myself on being an individual. However, no matter how much of an individual I think I am, I know that I fit into a few categories. It’s something that can’t be helped, we can all be categorized somehow. And given my birthdate, I can be categorized as part of Generation Y. Or the Millennial Generation. Or a generation of no good lazyasses who don’t know what the hell they’re doing and who are going to bring this great country down! It depends on who you talk to, really.

I can’t explain why, but I don’t feel as if I belong to this generation. I don’t mean that I would have fit in better with the Babyboomer or Generation X crowd. And I don’t mean that I feel as if I’m ahead of my time. For whatever reason, I simply do not feel as if I fit in. And I don’t know why.

But still, I am part of this generation. And it pains me when we get a bad rap. Every generation believes that its successor is doomed to fail. I’m only 25 and I already feel that way about the kids in school now (but I am trying to practice what I preach and give them a chance).

It seems every generation has the expectation of failure branded on it. The children of the 60′s and 70′s were good-for-nothing, pot-smoking, free-loving pansy hippies! Generation X was so disconnected, they had nothing to stay or stand for, and they listened to Nirvana! And Generation Y? Yeah, we’re expected to fall flat on our faces. But what’s new?

Every generation has its struggles. Our grandparents had the Great Depression and WWII. Our parents had the Vietnam War and the Civil Rights movements. And we’ve got two wars in the Middle East, The Great Recession, the responsibility of fixing social security (or finally admitting that it’s broken), and trying to figure out what the hell we can do about Global Warming. Yeah, we’ve got a lot on our plate.

On top of that, it seems that our world is constantly changing. Just look at how rapidly the world as we know it is fading into memory. Everything’s going digital. Soon CD’s, books, video game discs — all of that will be obsolete. There will be no physical copies of these things, and the few that still exist will be antiques. Communication is evolving every day. We haven’t even scratched the surface on Internet laws (piracy, bullying, scamming).

And who knows what lies ahead for us. Only time will tell, and the future is approaching very quickly. So we’d better get to work. All of us: Generation Y, Generation X, Baby Boomers — we’ve got to stop pointing the finger and start working together. In fact, let’s gets started right now.

Friday night a couple of friends and I went to see A Place to Bury Strangers (APTBS) and The Big Pink at the Granada Theater. Although The Big Pink was the headline act, we were actually going to see APTBS and felt that The Big Pink would just be a bonus. There was also a local band opening up the show, but after hearing a few seconds, we decided to pass on them and stood outside waiting for APTBS to kick off their set.

We had all seen APTBS before and they’re easily one of our favorite bands. I’m quite fond of shoegazer-wall-of-sound-noise rock. And APTBS definitely fits that description. They have a great sound and their album Exploding Head is phenomenal.

Oh, and they put on a great live performance.

The first time I saw APTBS, I was blown away. They were so loud, easily the loudest band I’ve ever heard. At that first gig, I felt the music as much as I heard it. After that night, I was in love.

And Friday night, they rocked it again. What I love about APTBS is that they don’t try to be rock ‘n’ roll. They are rock ‘n’ roll, in their own way.

I don’t enjoy concerts with a lot of “show”. I don’t need a light show and pyrotechnics. I want to hear some good songs by a band that knows how to play (remember: style over substance).

Oliver Ackermann, the singer and guitarist, does bring a little showmanship. He won’t hesitate to tear it up on his guitar and throw it around and trash it all for the sake of some good ol’ rock ‘n’ roll. But that’s APTBS, that’s who they are. It doesn’t feel phony. They don’t jump around and try to get the crowd into the show. They get the crowd into the show by rockin’. And rockin’ hard.

I was interested in hearing what The Big Pink would be like live. I like their debut album A Brief History of Love. Sadly, when they walked out, we knew it was going to be bad. The most entertaining thing I noticed was that their grungy image did not match their poppy sound. Aside from sounding really bad live, their presentation was very annoying.

They were trying far too hard to be cliche rock ‘n’ roll. The singer/guitarist was so animated, bouncing around while he played. He did fist pumps and even screamed out “We love Texas!” after a song. (Of course, everyone knows that Texans are a conceited bunch, and the crowd ate it up). The keyboardist was also bouncing around, to the point that he almost busted his ass a couple of times. The drummer tried so hard to look stone-faced and cold as she banged the skins. The bassist, complete with his Slayer jacket, threw his long hair around and headbanged as he played. I felt that the band was trying so hard to get us excited yet they had nothing to get us excited about. It felt so fake. It didn’t feel authentic at all. If they were trying to play on irony, they failed.

During the third song, my friends and I made the decision to bolt. Ironically, we left while they were playing “Velvet”, my favorite song from the album. The Big Pink were following the cliche formula, doing what had already been done so many times before. The experience was not different, it was not unique.

APTBS might not have as many fans as The Big Pink, but the people who do know about them and listen to them are rabid fans. APTBS have created a dedicated cult. And they’ve done it by branding themselves as “the loudest band in New York”. I know that they were the loudest band in Dallas on Friday night, and they might be the loudest band in the world. They don’t fake it, they don’t jump around trying to get you excited about a mediocre experience. They don’t try to appeal to everyone, there’s no way they can. They do what they do and they do it well. And they are very authentic about it.

Isn’t this what new marketing and the new thinking about business is all about? Isn’t this where we say the business world is headed?

When I was watching APTBS, I remember thinking to myself, This is our punk movement. This scene, this revival of the sounds of My Bloody Valentine and The Jesus and Mary Chain — this is our revolution.

And the new school of business, it feels very much like a punk movement. As was the case with punk rock, we’re fighting an establishment. We’re fighting against the rules of big business and tearing down the walls that they’re created. We want to be reminded that we’re people and that we matter when conducting business. We want to feel authenticity.

And if there’s one thing I want — in business, in my relationships, in life in general — is to be seen as being authentic. Of course, I hope to accomplish that by being authentic. I am who I am. I try to have my own views about things because I don’t want to be a parrot. Or a poser. I am an individual and I want to be seen as such. I want to be remembered for my authenticity, not as that guy who too busy running around tooting his own horn and fist-pumping and jumping around, trying to convince people he was awesome.

I want people to think I’m awesome because they genuinely think I am awesome.

Because I know I am.

For whatever reason, it seems that we humans can not leave others alone and simply worry about ourselves. Rather than focus only on what we are doing, we choose to push our noses in other people’s business. We look at what everyone else is doing and wonder if we should follow suit. What are people in Beverly Hills wearing? What’s hot on Top 40 radio? There are so many questions that we let distract us. Unfortunately, we look to see what others are doing when we attempt to measure our own success as well.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a novelist. I had so many ideas and stories that were one day going to make it on paper and find their way into the homes and hearts of thousands of readers and maybe even onto a few bestseller lists. I remember being discouraged by one of my favorite authors. Although I’ve read and enjoyed many of Bret Easton Ellis’s novels (American Psycho, The Rules of Attraction, Lunar Park), it was his debut Less Than Zero that made me feel inadequate. Why? Ellis had Less Than Zero published while he was a freshman in college. I’m having trouble balancing full-time college coursework and a part-time job, yet Ellis was publishing novels while working on his degree. If you think that’s impressive, S. E. Hinton had The Outsiders published when she was only 16 years old. That can be discouraging, even to someone in his early 20′s.

Some people can read a book in a day. I’m not talking about those 200-page books, I mean those big thick Harry Potter-size books. I, on the other hand, am a very slow reader. And an inconsistent one. I can start reading a book, put it down for a while, and pick it up a few days later. Because of this, even an extremely small book can take me quite some time to finish. When I think of those people who read at a much faster pace, I feel like the village idiot.

At the age of 23, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg became the world’s youngest billionaire. At age 25, I am nowhere near that and it does not seem as if I will be near that anytime soon.

Even if I do start building an empire tomorrow, it’s highly unlikely that I’ll ever be as rich as Warren Buffet.

By this point, you’re probably asking, What’s the point of all this? The point is that as long as you compare your success to that of others, you will always find a way to devalue your accomplishments and find a reason never to start bettering your situation.

I know I’m not the only one who’s ever let himself get down when comparing his accomplishments to others’. I remember a conversation I had with a good friend and former co-worker; my friend stated that he was 25 years old, about to be laid off, and had accomplished nothing. He wasn’t financially secure, hadn’t started his own venture, and couldn’t see anything on the horizon. He was focused too much on the extravagant success of others rather than seeing how his modest successes might help him in the future. My friend was smart, had a college degree, had freed himself of debt. He had gained some real-world experience and had learned some life lessons that he would carry with him forever and use to better himself.

I enjoy playing basketball. I’ll never be Michael Jordan. Should I stop playing?

I mess around on my guitar from time to time. I’ll never be a guitar god, but should I be any less proud of the melodies I create?

You can’t compare yourself to others. It’s just not healthy. We’re all born into a certain environment or certain situation. There are so many factors that affect us on a daily basis. All we can do is strive to make the best out of our situation, our one chance to do something special. The only person you can compare yourself to is yourself. Ask yourself, Where are you today? Where were you yesterday? And where are you headed? Are you moving forward? If not, what can you do to get yourself back on track? That is the healthiest method of comparison.

In case you haven’t heard, blogging is dead. Again. And social media is a fad. Just like computers and the Internet. If you have any kind of interest in social media, you’ve likely heard the question asked a thousand times: Is social media a fad? Some people really want to know. They’re worried that what they’re doing right now might be irrelevant as time goes on. And so they search and search for the answer to that ever important question: Is social media a fad?

Yes. Social media is a fad.

For many. And for some, not so much.

For those who believe that social media is some Holy Grail, some get-rich-quick Internet scheme — yes, social media is a fad. For those who use it for one-way conversation and flood and flood people with noise, the appeal of social media will die away.

Some people think that in order to reap the benefits of social media you just have to be there.

Just start a blog. About nothing. Make a Facebook fan page, the people will flock to it! Twitter is so amazing, you can automate everything! It’s so easy!

Some people think that simply being there will get them exposure and exponentially grow their sales.

Seriously, is anything ever that easy?

And when people realize that it’s not that easy, they will start dropping out. Those who properly utilize social media — those who build relationships and interact and build online communities — will still be around, doing their thing, reaping the benefits.

One reason some people will drop out of social media is because it’s not easily quantifiable. How do you translate your efforts into financial results? I can’t guarantee that this blog post or this tweet will earn any money. And that’s another thing — very rarely will one post or one tweet lead to any results. It takes time for it all to accumulate. It takes time for people to care.

To be honest, I’m not exactly sure where I plan to go with my own social networking. But I can say that having a blog has changed the way I look at things. For the better. And that’s something that’s hard to put a price tag on. So it’s safe to say that I see no reasonable explanation for why I would drop out of social media.

You know, other than the fact it’s all a fad.

Some people don’t like change. Change can be scary. Just look at the slugfest that was healthcare reform. And that bit of change happened to change so much in the course of a year that I stopped paying attention after a few months.

But even the smallest change can face big opposition.

Take Google Voice, for instance. When my friend Ben Woodall invited me to try it out, I instantly fell in love. The feature I really liked was receiving a text message which gave a preview of the voicemail a caller had just left me. Sure, the voice-to-text translation was far from perfect, but at least I could get a general idea of why someone was calling without having to check my voicemail at that very second.

However, there was one small problem with Google Voice. They had changed one little detail in an attempt to make voicemail function better. Google had added an extra prompt. Rather than have one prompt for you to leave all of your information, Google had a prompt for you to leave your name and then another for you to leave your message.

No big deal. No big change, right? That’s what I thought. But the problem was that people ignored the name prompt, so rather than simply stating a name, people started leaving a message. After a few seconds, they were cut off and prompted to leave a message, so they started their messages all over again.

One person informed me that my voicemail was “messed up” because she had to leave her message twice. I could hear people’s frustration in their voicemail messages. They were confused by one small change. So I eventually decided to drop Google Voice. And it’s a shame because I feel that Google offered a damn good service, but people couldn’t accept the change.

But I don’t blame them. Voicemail prompts are routine. It’s a simple service, why complicate it? Honestly, we don’t even need voicemail prompts, we already know what to do. And that’s why people don’t pay attention to the prompts; it’s much more efficient not to listen when you already know what’s being said.

Before my experience with Google Voice, I didn’t realize how much confusion even small changes could cause. It sounded so simple in theory, but in practice, it bombed.

So, now it’s your turn. Can you think of any other small changes that have caused more trouble than they should have?

*** UPDATE! ***
Ben recently informed me that I can opt to drop the name prompt on my Google Voice. I should have known to ask Ben about this. Although my dropping Google Voice was obviously unnecessary, the lesson of this post is still relevant. Thanks, Ben!

You know how you ask people how they’re doing or ask how their day’s going and you don’t really care? All you want to hear is “Good” and for the question to be reciprocated so that you can talk about yourself or your day or your weekend. This isn’t exactly like that, but it’s close.

It’s been a month since I posted a rant about a broken automated bill-pay system. The rant was a copy of an email I sent to a company’s customer service department. As of this post, I have heard nothing back from them. And that is highly disappointing.

And this brings me to a point: If you don’t care, don’t ask. If you’re not going to listen to my gripe, don’t even give me an opportunity to tell you how I feel. Now, not only am I upset about an experience that left a bitter taste in my mouth, but I’m also upset that nothing has been done. No contact has been made. Where does my complaint stand a month later? An unopened or discarded email? I don’t know.

When you get down to it, I guess this company isn’t obligated to care. They are the only provider in my area for their service. Therefore, I have no other option. So now matter how pissed off I get, what does it matter when I can’t leave them for another service provider? All I can do is complain to deaf ears. And to you.

Can’t you reply and say “We’re looking into it”? Even if you’re not. Just to make me feel better? Think of it as a placebo, give me the illusion that you care. Because right now, it’s pretty apparent that you don’t.

We all have varying degrees of influence. Some people just seem to have a knack for being leaders; people observe what they’re doing and naturally follow suit. These leaders could propose jumping off a cliff and everyone would be gung-ho and eager to execute the plan. Meanwhile, you propose going to the movies to see some artsy flick as opposed to this week’s action blockbuster and everyone stares at you as if you’ve lost your mind.

You may feel that events like this happen far too often. You may feel that you try and try but your efforts just aren’t worth it because you never see the results that you desire. But don’t get discouraged. Don’t give up.

Chances are that you have more influence than you realize. When you think no one’s paying attention, there may be someone who is observing and soaking up everything you say and do.

Here is a personal example:

The summer of 2007 was my third and final summer at Med Camps of Louisiana. While working there, I saw around 400 children with disabilities come and go, but this story revolves around one child. This kid was kind and obedient, never caused a bit of trouble. But I didn’t feel that I made an impression on the kid. I didn’t feel that I’d connected in any way.

A couple of weeks later, I saw the boy’s mother when she returned with her niece. She told me that her son had shaved his head to be like me. He didn’t go quite to the extent that I did…

But how cool is that? That is undoubtedly the greatest compliment I ever got.

Maybe you feel that your online influence is lacking as well. You don’t get any retweets, your links never get any hits, your blog posts never get any comments. Again, don’t get discouraged. My blog gets only a handful of hits a day (my peek is just over 30). I get very few comments and just as few retweets. According to Feedburner, jakelacaze.com has only 6 subscribers. My Facebook fan page has 8 fans. But it’s all good.

The other day, a friend mentioned that after reading my rant about meetings, she was inspired to skip out on one. Sure, maybe she was leaning that way already, but I like to think that I pushed her over the edge. And this makes me happy.

We live in a connected world. A world that is more connected than ever before. You never know who you’re connected to or how you’re connected to anyone (for elaboration, check out the six degrees of separation). Think about it: every little thing you do has the potential to change the world, if only a little bit. You don’t have to do anything epic, just be yourself.

If that’s not cool, I don’t know what is.